Yeah, I'm one of "THOSE" guys

So deal with it.

I've been seeing a therapist. This whole thing with Mimi f'd me up more than I've been letting on. It was manipulative and unhealthy and largely based in lies on her part. Yes, I played into it, and yes I didn't see the big red flashing lights and run when I should have and blah blah blah. Yes, I agree with you, what you're thinking now. Yes, those things are true. No. Not that one. Now you've gone too far.

Lying to your therapist is like lying in your journal." a friend told me. I can't remember which one, but I thought it was ingenious. Guess what? Mimi's been lying to hers. Classic. Why, when you see that someone is not who you thought, when you realize how bad they've been to you, when you can work through the logic and come to the realization that loving them doesn't make any sense, why do you still want them? I can't figure that one out. I guess, if it was easy to get over, it wouldn't be love.
I think Nerduda put it best:
"Love is so short,
Forgetting is so long."

Forget about the legs, and forget about the job and the head cold and the pot-freak out session. Forget about all that. By and large, the next months, maybe onto a year or more, are going to include the difficult and often painful process of getting over her. Time and space, if she'll give them to me-- and she promised this time, for what that's worth (which is little)-- are what it's going to take to get past this. I've tried to go around it, avoid it, fix it, now I have to go through it. It's the only way to the other side, and I have got to get there. I have felt so miserable for so long. Enough. It won't be all bad and it's not all doom and gloom. There will be fun stuff, and new moments, times of discovery and re-learning of old habits I liked. Ultimately, I get to be me again, and seeing as I like me so much, and most people agree, I think that's a good thing.