Wallow

Before the break up, if you can even call it that, I put together a bit of a goodbye playlist and ran it over and over, occaisionally adding, deleting and refinsing, but playing it again and again.

Once things were said and done though, I stopped. I put on music that was more rockin' and I stepped up and out and decided it was time to move on. That my heart hasn't quite followed suit is no matter.

Tonight though, I'm going, in this empty hotel room, to put on some Ryan Adams, play it on my tinny laptop speakers and ask myself over and over.. "Oh, why do they leave..." and if she'd only just "be my winding wheel". Fucking music. Fucking love. Fuck.